My little sister’s come out

What to do when your sister follows you out of the closet.




Dear Hot Stuff,


My 18-year-old sister has just come out as gay, I'm so proud of her! Our parents were a little taken aback but otherwise fine, after all, they went through the same thing with me. 


I'm writing to you because I know that she will look to me to take her out on the town and begin dating and whatnot, but I've been with my partner for six years since coming out at 20. I feel like a bit of an old fart! What can I do to help her? 


Lauren from Vale of Health 




Dear Veteran from Vale of Health,


Well, you could always send your sister my way if it would make things easier for you? I could take care of her in a kind of Christian Grey* slighter dominant older woman, non-relationship kind of way?




I understand completely. 


Well then, where to begin? Firstly, Veteran, just because you're in a long term relationship doesn't mean you're an old fogey! It's absolutely fabulous to be in such a durable partnership and if spending every weekend in your PJs with a glass of wine instead of dancing until dawn out on Camden High Street makes you boring, then so bloomin' well be it.  


So, what shall we do with your baby sister? Firstly, let it be known that the quantity of alcohol imbibed and then vomited won't make the celebrations/ bonding process any more qualitative. The most important thing is that you are very simply there for her - accessible and supportive at all times, be it for answering questions about sex, setting up a Gaydargirls account or buying her her very first copy of DIVA. 


There are obviously several other things that need to be done almost immediately. For example, she should almost definitely cut all of her hair off and stop shaving... I'M KIDDING. 


No, but seriously, you should start with simple things. For example, she might not have any gay friends yet and so it'll be up to big sis to accompany little sis out for her premiere pink soirée on the town. Invite your mates along, make an evening of it. You never know, it might almost be like a second coming out for you!  


Above all, take your mind back to when you first took your first baby lesbian steps all those years ago and be the mentor that many of us wish we'd had back then. The one that says, go for it, I'm proud of you, you can do whatever you want to do and be whoever the hell you like. 


(*I neither condone nor endorse the absolute pile of regressionist bollocks, Fifty Shades of Grey. I mean, who the frigging hell can orgasm from a NIPPLE MASSAGE? Let's all have a hearty giggle and move on. Please.)




Only reading DIVA online? You're missing out. For more news, reviews and commentary, check out the latest issue. It's pretty badass, if we do say so ourselves. //


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