One of the issues you may come across while dating online is the
possibility of meeting someone who lives further away than you
would like.
You will probably start off searching for women in your local
area, but occasionally you may be tempted to increase your range,
if things are not moving fast enough for you. So, should you do it?
Long distance relationships can be hard work and there are all
kinds of pitfalls and problems that can come up. They do work for
some people, at least for a while, but you will need to be very
honest with yourself and your partner to both consider whether it
will work for you and to actually make it work.
Long distance relationships can be more intense and less casual,
because you will need to invest more time, money and effort to see
your partner and the time you spend apart can be a nasty low to the
high of being together. That's why they are more suitable if you
have your own hobbies, interests and groups of friends so that you
don't feel lonely when you are apart.
Another thing to think about is that while local relationships
normalise and become routine, long distance relationships can often
maintain that level of excitement. Each time you see each other is
short and intense and feels like a special holiday. But if you're
considering moving in together (probably at a considerable personal
expense of moving/changing jobs, etc. for at least one of you),
it's worth giving the relationship a trial run of living together
for a few months, without making a big decision. Sometimes, even
after a few years of going back and forth, the seemingly endless
honeymoon can suddenly finish when the mundane reality of the
relationship hits.
While you are apart, it's important to be clear on the
relationship's rules - monogamy or non-monogamy, how often you will
expect to see each other, etc.. It's very easy to start to feel
like the relationship is slipping away if you don't talk for a long
time, so maintaining a good amount of contact and being reliable,
honest and trustworthy with each other is the most important thing.
For most people, long distance relationships are not a welcome
choice but something that has to be endured for a while, hoping
things will become more local. Talk things through with your
partner to see how feasible that is for you, but most importantly,
think if you would be willing to move for someone as a matter of
principle before deciding on whether it's worth attempting a long
distance relationship.
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