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COOKIES & PRIVACY POLICY

Review: Complete Gay & Lesbian Manners

We review author Steven Petrow's definitive guide to LGBT life

India Gumbley

Tue, 06 Sep 2011 15:53:12 GMT | Updated 1 years today

Full of scenarios that you always wanted help with but never dared ask amongst friends (poll for the etiquette of fellatio, anybody?) this bible of gay manners is crammed with questions you're burning to have answered. Who picks up the bill on the first date? What are on the rules on PDA? What do two brides wear to the ceremony?

 

Presented in a practical way, this straightforward book chronicles an entire gay lifetime: from the initial steps of coming out, dating and civil partnerships; right through to parenting and illness. It has every point of life covered, from the mundane, such as dressing appropriately in the workplace, to the slightly trickier aspects of life-time commitment and planning a family.

 

Written by gay journalist Steven Petrow, the book is an expansion of his monthly column 'Queeries.' The comprehensive guide is compiled from his readers' own experiences and whilst most of the dilemmas are not strictly gay exclusive, he consistently presents them with a LGBT spin.

 

The guide is well targeted at its audience, although at times it feels Petrow is writing solely for his male readership.  Women clamouring for a lesbian focused handbook may be left a little disappointed.

 

Many of the tips may seem common knowledge but are surprisingly useful. It might seem obvious that same-sex couples have the option of changing their surnames after marriage, but its still reassuring to have guru Petrow confirm this.

 

The most entertaining parts of the book often come in the form of the lesbian queries, although too few, which include: being mistaken for sisters, the role of the mother-of-the-bride at a LGBT wedding, and what to do if you feel awkward about your girlfriend brandishing a dildo.

 

Petrow also touches on serious issues such as bereavement and HIV and whilst all his subjects are tactfully approached, you can't help feeling the book could have benefited from a dash more humour.

 

The book is conveniently out for autumn, one of the highest points in the year for a self-help surge, so expect to see it on the shelves of a friend's home-library before Christmas. If you haven't already bought it then take it down and have a sneak peek- you could learn some manners.

 

Oh, and for those who were wondering, Petrow blows apart one of the biggest myths of gay relationships: Just because you're a same-sex couple it is NOT good etiquette to borrow your partner's clothes!

 

Workman Publishing

448 pages

 

Buy it here

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Comments

  • Jemma Lunniss - Tue, 06 Sep 2011 17:02:24 GMT -

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    Ooh eer, me and my girfriend constantly borrow eachothers clothes (yes, including underwear sometimes) i just see it as having more options!

  • B.I.D Magazine - Wed, 07 Sep 2011 14:56:00 GMT -

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    B.I.D (Behaviour, Identity, Desire) Magazine is a lifestyle magazine for lesbian and bisexual women. B.I.D operates a blog (b-i-d-magazine.tumblr.com) and is releasing it's first issue in the coming months. We are looking for new writers, so wherever you are in the world, if you think you have something interesting to offer, send us an email at magazine.bid@gmail.com.