Honey Money, Catherine Hakim's book about the power of "erotic
capital" describes itself as "groundbreaking". The central argument
is that given that very attractive people are known to generally do
well in life, we should all make the most of our looks, sex appeal
and social skills (charm) in order to "get a better deal" in both
our public and our private lives.
It's an interesting book, and I agree with some of Hakim's
arguments. She notes, for example, that many women tend to remain
complicit in treating men as first class citizens who are "more
equal" than women, which rings true to me (not always, of course,
but I've seen it in action in the past). I don't have any objection
to the idea of people using their looks and social skills to get
ahead; this happens currently, and suggesting that people exploit
this more seems a reasonable suggestion. People with above average
intelligence tend to use that to their advantage; why shouldn't
people work on improving their self-presentation just as others
pursue further educational training, for example? Broadly speaking
the book contains some bits of sensible advice that readers are
free to take or leave as they see fit.
One thing did bug me, however. The book is fairly clearly
written for a heterosexual audience; Hakim speaks of a "sex
deficit" (meaning men want sex more than women, thus putting women
in a position of power). At one point she suggests that gays are
more of a minority than commonly thought; she mentions surveys that
say the proportion of the population who experience homosexual
inclinations or activity is 1-2%.
Then she comments (in a section headed 'Gay communities' in
chapter two) that "Good looks matter to some lesbians, but not to
most. Lesbians are not famed for exceptionally high levels of
erotic capital and sexuality." Hakim states this as fact; I would
beg to differ.
Indeed, a lot of us would; I asked DIVA's Facebook followers if
they agreed that good looks matter to some lesbians, but not to
most, and 23 people said yes, they agreed, while 68 said no, they
disagreed. A fairly conclusive result, I think. The poll result
(and my own personal experience) suggests to me that Hakim has
unquestioningly bought in to some (hopefully rather outdated by
now) stereotypes about gay women and their self-presentation.
As I'm sure you do, I know plenty of lesbians who are attracted
to good-looking women, who make an effort with their own
self-presentation. I know plenty of straight women who date plain
men with indifferent fashion sense and who themselves wear
sweatpants and no make-up. I found Hakim's comment rather offensive
and dismissive, and to some extent I lost confidence in her at
around this point in the book.
Anyway, in spite of this it's a (thought-) provoking read, and
if you enjoy these kinds of sociological discussions, it is worth a
look.
Honey Money: The Power of
Erotic Capital is available now
Honey Money at amazon.co.uk
