I purposely didn't put the word 'gay' into the title, for
reasons I will explain later. I am a (gay) woman in my late 20s;
I've been with my girlfriend for almost a year and I'm at a very
happy and content stage in my life.
We have pretty much planned our lives together, starting with
travelling the world in less than 10 weeks! One day, we want to get
married, get a dog, buy a nice house and have a few children. Not
everyone's life plan, but quite a traditional one, yes?
This is where I get a little peeved, when I realise that we
actually don't have the right to get married in this country. I
often ask myself why; I am a primary school teacher, I am a good
citizen; I've worked all my life and paid taxes. I chose my career
because it makes me feel proud - I like to think I do well for
society; I help shape the future. I work bloody hard, yet, I don't
get the basic human rights that I should be entitled to. Why?
Because I love someone of the same sex.
Many of my friends (and even family members) ask: "But you can
just have a civil partnership - isn't it pretty much the same?"
Well, that's it really, I don't want just a civil
partnership. I don't want to ask my girlfriend if she will
'civil-partnership' me, I want to ask her to marry me. I want our
marriage to be recognised all over the world and have the same
status and importance as straight couples get.
I'd also like the option to get married in a church - purely for
the same reasons as non-religious, straight couples will get
married in churches; because it 'fits' with the theme of a wedding
and is a 'nice place' to get married.
I said I didn't use the word 'gay' in the title, purely because
I don't see the need for it in front of marriage. For what I've
described, my wants are for me and my girlfriend to be accepted as
partners through marriage (the same kind of marriage that a
straight couple would have). Therefore, it's not really necessarily
a 'gay' marriage, just like I don't wake up and have gay breakfast,
go to gay work and come home to my gay girlfriend. It's marriage,
no matter what combination of genitalia the couple own!
It also angers me that many religious organisations discriminate
against couples of the same sex, for what seems to me (and probably
the rest of society) as completely ludicrous and hypocritical. For
example, the argument that marriage should only be a commitment
that a male and female can make, due to the reproduction of
children. I'm sure you'll agree with me; if marriage was banned to
all infertile men or women, there would be a public outcry. It
would be seen as unfair - so why isn't marriage open to everyone,
regardless of who they love?
I hope the government wake up to this issue and make the right
choice in the equal marriage consultation ending today, 14 June.
I'd love nothing more than to be able to marry my girlfriend when
we come back to the UK after our travels around the world!
Pictured, Caroline and her partner Sam