This week may not have involved the actual spilling of blood
but, now half way through my '8 weeks to fight-fit' challenge, I
feel bled dry (see pic, taken at the end of this week's final
session).
Every time I try my hardest to listen, learn and execute, it
isn't nearly good enough; every time I think I've blasted through
another barrier, I'm faced with a tougher one that's even trickier
to figure out and overcome. What's more, there's no spare time
self-pity or victimhood; straight after sessions I'm either too
busy downing a protein shake or washing my hand-wraps to sit about
in the changing room and moan.
Don't get me wrong: I still feel rubbish, quite a lot of the
time. But I now know from the experience of the last few weeks that
the despondency and exhaustion will always pass, leave space for
fresh euphoria and triumph. In just one day I can swing from
excited and determined to fearful and despairing (and back again).
It's always just after the worst moments - the points at which I
feel my body, mind and spirit are going to break from the physical
and emotional pressure of training 3+ hours a day with the focus
primarily on what I'm doing wrong - that I'm granted access to
another level of strength. This week it was our Friday night
sparring session, where, just after taking my hardest knock yet,
smack in the middle of my nose, I managed to land a hook that
caused my opponent to ricochet onto the ropes.
Granted, that was one of the better moments; the last few days
have also involved much time staring at the mirror, perfecting
certain boxing movements against an imaginary opponent only to then
find myself incapable of putting those things into practice when
against a real, live human being. It's disappointing, I'll admit.
And yes, I still wonder sometimes who or what on earth I'm doing
this for.
But here's the thing: I'm a real believer that if you have a
brilliant teacher who you trust, admire and respect, and, of
course, if you are completely willing to do what is asked of you,
then you will inevitably achieve the success you deserve. By 'you'
I, of course, mean 'me', and by success I mean one thing only, a
steady and visible improvement every week. Luckily for me, I do
trust, admire and respect my coach, the second ever British female
boxer to turn professional and the English and European Flyweight
champion, Cathy Brown (www.cathybrown.co.uk) and
am willing to do what she asks in preparation for Fight Night on 16
November. I know she's got my back, 100%, but she's also on it, all
the time, and will continue to be until the fight is over.
This type of relentless commitment and focus as a coach is, of
course, what I would expect from a woman who was top of her game in
the ring for many years. But I'll admit it - I've been reintroduced
to my inner adolescent since training with Brown; even when I know
she's right (recently, on my diet for example), I still want to
stamp my feet and go to the party (ie. eat chocolate cake). But I
won't let that irritating teenager inside me win. I don't want to
regret anything when I look back on this experience, nor to wonder
whether I could've done more, been fitter or fought better. So no
more lunching out with friends at trendy Mexican restaurants,
unless they can serve me something far more wholesome than
tortilla; no more bedtimes after 11pm and no more early mornings to
catch up on work I haven't done. Hopefully I'll get my just
desserts (with extra cream) once this is over…
Fight night is 16 November 2012. To buy tickets (£25,
£35 or £45), contact: fightformind@yahoo.com
If you want to sponsor Lucy (all the money raised goes to MIND),
please visit www.justgiving.com/frylucy
