So you're getting hitched. Tomorrow. Then why is a gorgeous
stranger - nude but for a thong - writhing in between your splayed
thighs while your wife-to-be is sitting beside you, fully-clothed,
getting a lap-dance of her own? This is "Activities For Couples"
taken to a whole new level.
In the cloistered confines of a lap-dancing club, where red velvet
adorns the walls and the indulgent pops of champagne uncorking can
be heard through the din of slow pulsing bass, you, your Mrs and
your best mates are celebrating one last night of freedom.
Your friends, having bought you both a lap-dance from your
favourite strippers, are now cavorting ridiculously around a pole,
gesturing playfully at you with tongues waggling through the "V" of
their fingers. You look over to your beautiful bride-to-be and see
that she's getting a little too excited with her treat, and is
reaching up to touch her dancer. You leap to stop her, grabbing her
hand and tutting. Lap-dances maybe, but even this hen night has its
At least, that's how DIVA reader Nicki Bow spent her hen night
back in 2010. "We told them we were getting married and they told
us to come back after the wedding and they'd give us a free dance
- we're thinking about going back for our second anniversary!"
Imagining myself utterly consumed with jealousy in such a
situation, I can only marvel at how strong and secure their love
for each other must be.
With the advent of civil partnerships, lesbians are taking on all
the contemporary trappings of the modern marriage industry -
honeymoons, chocolate fountains, white dresses, and yes, hen nights
and all their associated debauchery.
A stag night - thought to originate from a Spartan custom - was
traditionally the bachelor's last night with his mates as an
unmarried man; but the girls cottoned on sometime during the sexual
revolution in the 1960s and decided to throw parties of their own.
The tradition has since blossomed into extravagant affairs
- stag or hen nights have stretched to weekends, and in some
cases even an entire week.
Read the rest of this feature article in the March issue
of DIVA magazine, on sale from 2 February