Oh. It's happened. I always knew one day it would happen, but I
wasn't ready. Not before Christmas. Not this year. Not now! OK,
just calm down, take a deep breath and come to terms with it…
People I know, who are my age and I've grown up with, are getting
married. And once they're married, they'll have children and then
mortgages and dinner parties and sensible, family cars and
christenings and kids birthday parties and they won't go out
anymore or drink vodka out of condoms or dance and fall over or be
sick in bushes…. OH HELP!
Get a grip, let's look at this sensibly; I'm not against any of
those things at all. I mean, they might happen to me one day,
although I struggle to imagine that anyone could put up with me
long enough to want to marry me and, even if they did, they must be
mentally unstable. I can't look after myself without a chaperone,
so there's no way I would be able to look after a child as well.
I'm bad with money, I can't drive and I generally have trouble
taking anything seriously. So how the hell are my friends managing
I'm 24 *shudders* and I suppose I should grow up at some point.
I'm just waiting for it to happen. I don't want to be the girl on
the outside forever, the one still single at weddings in 7 years'
time; "Who is that sad little person over there with the hip
flask?" asks the mother of the bride. "Oh that's just Sarah," says
my newly-wedded friend. "She's always been like that."
Maybe I'm overreacting though; it could just be the case that my
friends grew up too quickly. That seems a fair assumption to make;
they're mostly in long term relationships, some have mortgages and
some have wedding vows to write. I have the freedom to go out and
do whatever and whomever I please. They plan holidays abroad
together and I plan what to eat for lunch. They have joint accounts
and I'm stuck in my overdraft, again. Hmm… OK, maybe their way of
life doesn't sound too bad. Bugger.
My female friends are all strong, feisty types who have plans of
how they want their lives to turn out. We sat in a pub the other
day and they presented their life plans; "I would like to be
married by 26, have my first child by 28 at the latest and
concentrate on my career from the age of 30. Then by 35 we'll own
the property and an Audi" says one of my sensible friends. I just
sigh and go back to swirling ice around my empty glass. How do I
want my life to turn out? I don't know, but there's no way I'm
making a plan.
There is something to be said for planning though; it gives you
motivation to achieve and milestones to get to. It gives you the
edge and that desire to get out of bed in the morning. Maybe that's
something I'm missing because I just revolve my life around when
Jeremy Kyle is on. Let's face it, that's sad.
Right, I'm gonna do it. I'm biting the bullet. I'm going to grow
up and be sensible with money and settle down. Don't try and stop
me, it is happening! I'll do it tomorrow. Oh no, I'm busy tomorrow,
I'll do it Saturday. Oh wait, I'm going out Saturday night. I'll do
it Monday. Definitely. Well, maybe…
Follow Sarah on Twitter: @sleevsie22