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COOKIES & PRIVACY POLICY

Man wins shared custody of child he fathered with lesbian

A gay man has won paternal access to a child he conceived with a lesbian to whom he was once married.

Peter Lloyd

Thu, 15 Mar 2012 13:46:39 GMT | Updated 1 years today

A gay man has won paternal access to a child he conceived with a lesbian to whom he was once married.

The man, who has not been named, already had minimal contact with the child - five hours per fortnight - but requested overnight rights and additional freedom to take him on holiday.

Yesterday, Lady Justice Black and two other judges at London's Court of Appeal ruled in his favour.

She claimed that the agreement between the adults was not "a dry, legal contract" and that
the phrase 'sperm donor' should be dropped because it wrongly suggests a biological father is giving his child away, the Daily Mail add.

The decision comes despite the child's mother and her partner saying the applicant's request is a breach of an agreement "made over dinner".

During the hearing, Alex Verdan, QC for the father, denied suggestions this was an attempt to "marginalise" the mother's partner and insisted there had been no "clear agreement", pre-conception.

Verdan emphasised that the father has no desire to undermine the role of the mother and her partner as the boy's primary carers, but wants sufficient contact with the boy, his only son, who is now two years old.

However, the women disagree, arguing that a three-parent family was never part of the plan.

Charles Howard QC, for the mother and her partner, said they would have opted for an anonymous sperm donor if they knew the father would try to gain greater involvement.

British law currently states that donors who donate their sperm through a licensed clinic are not normally treated as being legal parents of the children they help conceive.  This means that clinic donors cannot be held financially responsible for maintaining their genetic children, and nor will their donor-conceived children have any rights of inheritance from them. 

As detailed on the Stonewall website, a donor who donates sperm outside the context of a licensed fertility clinic (for example, a friend or a donor found through a website online) does not acquire this automatic protection and may be treated as the legal father of the child.

Ruling in the case, Lord Justice Thorpe said: "[The father's] involvement in the creation of [the child] and his commitment to [the child] from birth suggest that he may be seeking to offer a relationship of considerable value.

"It is generally accepted that a child gains by having two parents. It does not follow that the addition of a third is necessarily disadvantageous. Human emotions are powerful and inconstant. B and C may have had the desire to create a two-parent lesbian nuclear family completely intact and free from fracture.

"But such desires may be essentially selfish and  may later insufficiently weigh the welfare and developing rights of the child that they have created."

Currently, British family law fails to offer equal access to both mothers and fathers - something men's activists slam as sexist.

Now, yesterday's ruling has been welcomed by parents - and grandparents - campaigning for equal rights.

Jane Keir, Head of Family Law at Kingsley Napley - who represented the father, told the PinkPaper.com: "The decision is a welcome reminder that, whatever the family structure, the focus must always remain what is best for the particular child concerned.  Adult preconceptions and archetypes of family life might inform, but must never displace, that simple but fundamental enquiry.
 
"The father hopes the decision will assist in any family situation where a child stands to benefit from having good quality contact with important adults other than those he lives with - one example being grandparents. 

"Such adults might have a great deal to offer a child through a developing regime of contact, which need not in any way undermine the child's primary carers, home life or well-being."

 

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