"It's been four months now and I haven't thought about anything
other than Anna since we broke up," still heart-broken lesbian
Florence McKellan, 25, confirmed via telephone earlier today. "I
have tried to think about other things - I used to be very
interested in recycling, for example - but try as I might, my mind
always goes back to Anna," she said. "What is she doing right now,
for example? Who is she with? Does she ever wonder if the two of us
should get back together? What is she doing now? Who is she with?
Has she been checking my Facebook updates? And so on."
News of the record-breaking obsession came as only a mild
surprise to Catherine Scurry, a close friend of Ms McKellan. Scurry
told DIVA that the doomed couple first met last December at her
bi-annual Christmas party and "hit it off immediately".
Unfortunately, Anna was soon revealed to be a hideous, faithless
wretch and broke McKellan's heart into about a thousand pieces,
Scurry continued. "I probably should have told Flo that Anna has a
reputation for chewing women up and spitting them out like just
another mouthful of spit," added Scurry, an aspiring poet. "But I
think a part of me just wanted to see what would happen. I mean Flo
always seemed to be so confident and self-assured... I was curious
to see what she'd be like if Anna completely decimated her
world."
The previous LGBT record of 119 days was also held by Ms
McKellan, though that time it was all about Maria.
