The winner of the coveted Miss Too Pretty To Be A Lesbian 2011
crown has been stripped of her title this week, DIVA can
reveal.
The now disgraced winner, Catherine Flame of Berkshire,
Berkinghamshire, had grossly exaggerated the number of backhanded
compliments she had received from both friends and strangers, an
increasingly outraged investigative panel found.
According to sources, Flame, 18, had clinched the prestigious
competition, which took place in September, by repeatedly telling
judges: "No one believes I'm a lesbian. Whenever I tell someone
they're like: 'No way are you a lesbo! I thought lesbians were all
repulsive mingers but you're really stunning!' I probably get that
about twenty or thirty times a day."
Information has since come to light, however, that raises
questions about Flame's relationship with the truth.
"I totally believed she was a lesbian when she told me," said
former colleague, Sam Gottard, when called in for questioning by
the investigating panel. "So did I," added someone else. "Me too,"
added a third person.
Catherine's successor, former runner-up Dafnee Smythe, was said
to be "extremely stoked" at being announced the new Miss Too Pretty
To Be A Lesbian 2011. "No one is going to believe this!" she told
DIVA. "I so don't look like a lesbian!"
